"Why do people have to wear underwear?"

OK, so I've gotten pretty good at all of these "why????" questions and believe you me, it has not been easy. The kids is just too damn smart for his own good. Gone are the days when I could simply say "Oh, I never knew that!" when I was caught multi-tasking and not quite really listening (which led to a full 2 years of "momma, did you never know?" questions). Now, he even throws in a trick question here and there, just to see if I'm listening. With that cute, innocent little "right mama?" behind it, just to see if I'm paying attention.

So Monday he started swim lessons at our pool club and afterwards, I take him into the locker room and begin to change him back in to dry clothes. At which point, with a number of ladies standing around, he begins to question the usefulness of underwear. It goes something like this...me saying, Jakey please pick your foot up and put it into this leg of your underwear please and him not moving said foot, but instead asking "but why do people have to wear underwear, mamma?" In hopes of moving him along a bit, I respond...ah because otherwise your shorts would rub on your bottom and give you a rash. Nope, doesn't end there. "But mama, my shorts are very soft so why would they hurt my bottom?" Me... "well not all shorts and pants are soft, so you need to wear underwear and besides your underwear keeps your bottom, which can get dirty and smelly during the day from touching your pants or shorts"

The Boy..."But then why does my Nanny wash my shorts and pants if they don't touch my bottom? And if my bottom does touch them, she washes them anyway, so it's OK" Me... "It's just a law of nature, you have to wear underwear (can you tell I'm running out of solid rationale here? and getting close to the "because I said so" line I swore I would never use) Boy Genius... "But mama, I could get dressed much more faster (he's big on "much more" these days) if I didn't have to wear them and you could save your money and buy me toys, I would much more (see what I mean) rather have toys than underwear"

A starting to get frustrated me..."Jakey, can we possibly have this debate at home and not here in the middle of the locker room with you and your naked bottom hanging out...cause mommy is tired and hungry and I'd like to get home sometime tonight?!?!?" The negotiator... "Then I shouldn't wear underwear and we could get home much more quicker, mommy"... An exasperated me: "OK, at this point, you're about to have to walk out of here butt naked boy, so pick what u want to put on and let's GO" Any guesses what he picked? Yep, NO underwear.

And the whole way home, "But Momma, WHY do I have to wear them, my bottom feels much more better like this?" Oy vey!!!!

And the truth is, I really could NOT think of one good reason why he had to wear underwear?!?!?!?!?!?!? Any and all suggestions (because this subject WILL arise again) are totally welcome...

1-800-Pimple Store... LOL LOL

One of Jake's new favorite things to do is to write down the 800 numbers that come on during the many commercials while watching "Are you smarter than a 5th grader" or "Americas Funniest Videos". A couple of weeks ago, he took the initiative to write one especially interesting one down. Then, when Uncle JJ came up from the manhole (AKA, the basement), Jakey proceeded to present him with the number and said "Here, JJ, this is the number to the Pimple Store for you". Now JJ, who insists of getting into serious conversations with an almost 5 year old went on to try to convince him that he didn't even have one pimple on his face...any guesses regarding who won that debate?

Just this past week, Nanny, Jake and I were watching TV together and of course, for those who know Nanny, you know she has a battery that never quits and can rarely, if ever, manage to actually SIT and watch TV for more than a few minutes at a time. So, during one commercial where I was distracted with my bb and Nanny walked into the kitchen to wipe a speck off the counter, Jake took the liberty of writing down the number for one of those electric carts that normal senior citizens sometimes use. He then proceeded to get the phone and dial the number and explain to the lady on the other end that he was calling to get one of those cart things for his Nanny. Then he went over and handed her the phone and here's how the conversation went...

"Hello, who is this? Oh my, I'm so sorry, my grandson dialed the phone and we didn't realize. No, no, I don't need an electric cart. No, really, I have no need for ...oh, what did you say it has? It does what? Ahh, wait a minute, no, no, I DON'T need one. Thank you, good-bye" Then she proceeded to chase Jake all over the house...him giggling out of control and her trying to catch him.

It leaves me to wonder what will happen when he figures out how to use my credit card to pay for things. We all know he could easily memorize the number and then who knows what will be showing up on the doorstep!!!

One more interesting update on our boy...so last weekend, Aunt No No and Aunt Bear came over to go to the pool and play. Afterwards, we decided to have an impromptu bbq so No No and I went off to the store to pick up a few things and Jakey and Aunt Bear stayed home and started playing one of Jake's states game. When we returned, Aunt Bear was so excited to show us how Jakey had learned to count syllables!!!! And sure enough, any word you ask him, he can tell you exactly how many syllables it has!!! I'm fairly sure I was in middle school the first time I even heard the concept of syllables...our boy never ceases to amaze us!!!

Hope everyone is having a good week! (And YES, 3 posts in the same month...woo hoo for mommy)

"Where's My Daddy?"

A month or so back, we were on our way to a birthday party and from the back seat of the car the question comes... "mommy, where's my daddy?" Now we've talked about this subject many times before and we've ready many, many books about it, but I could tell by his tone, this time was going to be different.

I started to explain about him not having a daddy and how lots of kids don't have a daddy and how he has SO many people who love him. And the question comes back..."BUT, WHERE is my daddy? I WANT to see him! I JUST WANT him!!!" Hmmmm, tough conversation to have while driving, no? I decide to take the "logical approach"... I AM an engineer, after all. And I ask, so what is it exactly that you feel you're missing with a daddy???? And the answer comes back "I JUST WANT HIM!!!"....hmmm....this is clearly not going well.

So, I try to explain the whole thing again about how I don't know who he is and he doesn't know about us. Now, here's where him being a little smartypants gets me into big trouble. So he says "then how can his sperm have met up with your egg if you never met him?" Oh boy, now I'm talking about sperm and eggs with a 4 year old...while driving, no less!!!!!

So, I calmly explain the the doctor took the egg from mommy and the sperm from the donor and put them together. So he sits straight up and says "then let's ask the doctor who my daddy is!" Hmmm...makes sense, no? So, I try to explain that he's not allowed to tell us who his daddy is because it's a secret and he'll get in big bad trouble if he does. And he laughs and says, "that's just silly mommy, he'll tell me who he is because he's MY daddy!!" Oy Vey...

At this point, I can tell that he's getting a little bit upset so I decide to pull over and get out his picture book and show him the only picture we have of his daddy FOR THE VERY FIRST TIME. (Yes, on the side of the road...and NO, not what I had planned) I pull over and ask "would you like to see a picture of your daddy?" And OMG, you'd think I just told him Santa Claus was on the roof of the car with a bag of toys just for him.!! So, I take out the book (which he's looked through a hundred times, but never known who that boy was in the middle of one page) and I show him the picture of his daddy as a child. He bends down and kisses the picture in the book and says "momma, wherever my daddy is he knows that I just sent him a kiss." OK, so it's breaking my heart at this moment. And I sit there on the side of the road wondering was it fair to have made the decision to bring him into this world knowing he would never be able to meet his daddy? Was it cruel? Was it selfish?

As I try to fight back the tears, he looks up at me, closes the book and says "mommy, why are we still sitting here, I'm going to miss the cake!" And reverts back to his non-stop chattering about the "beautiful clouds" and how "much more better" he is at something or other than anyone else in his class and on and on and on. And just like that, we returned back to life as we know it...

Though I'm quite sure this is not the last conversation we will have on this subject...

Holy Cow!!

Recent pics

Nanny and her Chuchee's on Easter / At Jet's training camp with Pops

OK, so "Holy Cow" was about all I could say when I logged on and saw that it said my last post was on April 17th!!!!!! OMG... in the life of an almost 5 year old, that's really just about a lifetime ago. I could come up with a ton of excuses, but I'm fairly sure I've used them all already at one time or another. So, as I'm fairly certain every mommy has to do for one reason or another each and every day, I'm going to forgive myself and move on...

The question is, where to even begin???? We had yet another awesome vacation to the Dominican Republic and yes, it was our 5th time returning to the very same resort. At this point, we're almost like family. Nanny, Aunt Bear and Aunt No No were with us this time around and other than a little rain on the first day, we had beautiful weather.

Jake was absolutely AMAZING in the water this time around. Nanny and I had to laugh thinking back only just a year or so ago when he would cry anytime water even came close to splashing on his face because this year he was jumping, sliding down the slides and swimming (still with his vest) in the deep water in the big pool. To see him DIVING for rings though, honestly left me speechless!!! Just two weeks earlier during his swim lessons at the YMCA he would barely put his nose into the water when the instructor asked him to put his head under...so it was just amazing to see what a difference two weeks can make (and the incentive of diving for something).

The trip was fairly uneventful, other than a little episode at the Japanese restaurant. At home, when we get sushi, Jake typically eats sweet potato rolls and loves them. Well, at the Japanese restaurant they served sushi as an appetizer before the actual cooking began. Before I could say anything, Jakey ate 2 or 3 of the rolls that contained God only knows what kind of raw fish. I wasn't sure if I should stop him or panic or both, and so I basically just sat and watched and waited. Well, about 5 minutes later, he laid his head on my shoulder and I had a feeling things were about to get interesting. As I turned to ask him if he was ok, up and out came the sushi (and just about everything else he had eaten all day, it seemed). Aunt Bear, who was on the other side of him, sat there in a state of shock for at least the first 2 minutes and then I think No-No must have slapped her to force her into action. Luckily the others sharing our table were VERY understanding and after a complete change of clothes and a showering off, he was back at the table good as new (with a bowl of dinosaur "opameal" brought down from our room).

All in all, a great trip and I have lots of pictures which I'll hopefully get around to posting sometime before he turns 10...lol

Jake has made a ton of progress in terms of gross motor skills... he swings a bat with authority now and likes to play hockey in our driveway with uncle JJ (and make him use the little stick), he road his bike around our entire block for the first time and it's a mile around, with a few pretty tough hills, he's gotten good at gymnastics and is even going to move up a level in Sept. To my surprise, he even asked if he could play soccer when he turns 5, so I've signed him up for the fall session and hopefully, this time around he won't spend the majority of the time sitting on my lap.

He's going to start kindergarten in the fall at his Montessori school because our public school only has half day kindergarten and there was no way to make that work! Academically, he's still just amazing and the teachers have started to call him Doogie Howser because of his math skills and now even his ability to read and learn new words so easily. I think a lot of it has to do with his amazing memory...the kid can really just recall anything he's seen or written back till what seems like 5 days after he was born. Most of our conversations these days start with "mommy, remember when..." and most times, mommy doesn't remember AT ALL until he spends the next 10 minutes telling me everything that surrounded the event...what I was wearing, where we were, who else was there, what he said, what I said...until finally this old brain of mine locates the memory in between all of those cobwebs.

He's frequently heard telling people how to spell his name backwards, his phone number backwards, and all kinds of other freaky smart things. I have NO idea where he comes up with this stuff, but I'm quite sure he has some form of photographic memory that allows him to visualize whatever it is he's repeating backwards...whatever it is, he continues to just amaze us each and every day with something.

He still struggles a bit on the socializing side of things and truth be told, he probably gets that from me because I'm not good about getting to know new people or talking with strangers. It seems he's much more comfortable talking with adults than with children and when asked who was his favorite friend from his first day at camp, he answered "my teacher, Ms Jane" ...which, sadly, did not surprise me. He had brought in his geography floor puzzle to school that morning, and the other kids really wanted to do it with him, but he got very frustrated when they were trying to put the continents in all the wrong places and especially when one tried to put North America below South America...you would have thought the other kid had insulted him momma!! LOL

Jakey Line of the Week...

We had a bit of rough start at summer camp this year and he was basically crying and every morning about not wanting to go. One day, he even almost negotiated his way out of it when he promised his Nanny that he would be good if she would take him home with her to the shore. So, yesterday, we tried a day at a new camp which just so happens to be on the same campus as my office (can you say, oh so convenient?). As with any first day at a new place, he was a bit nervous and shy and I arranged to stay with him for the first hour and we brought in his picture book so he could have something to show his new friends and talk to them about.

Well, in the course of page flipping with his new teacher, we came upon the picture of him and Jordan and when the teacher asked who that pretty little girl was, he said proudly "that's my sister, Jordan". I wasn't about to correct him, I know better than to get into that debate...been there, done that, not pretty and no intentions of going back ANY time soon. Then we came to Hallie and baby Lea and the teacher asked who are these 2 adorable little girls and he answered "that's my sister Hallie and my other sister, Baby Lea". Well, at this point, the teacher was definitely looking at me and I was still not talking.

Then we turn to the page with all of his donor siblings and the picture of the donor in the middle. Well, at this point I was seriously questioning what the heck I was thinking when I had agreed to bring that damn book in... And in the very next breath, he points to the picture in the middle of the page and says "that's my OWNER (aka, donor), he's my daddy, but he just doesn't know it". Now it was the teacher's turn to be speechless. So, he goes on to add "he gave he sperm that my mommy's egg needed to make me, but mommy never met him either because the doctor put the sperm and egg together". Again, I don't look up and she says nothing...mouth clearly agape at this point. So, on he goes sensing he has a captivated audience..."the doctor knows who my daddy is, but he can't tell me because it's a secret and he'd get in big, bad trouble if he did. But that's ok because I have a pops and a JJ and a nanny and mommy says daddy's aren't always all they're "smashed up" (aka cracked up) to be. Plus, I have a posse and I don't know anyone else who has one of those, do you?!"

Needless to say, I had a lot of explaining to do... LOL LOL