Our 1st Trip To The Principal's Office...

Incident Report:
When: this past Monday around 3 pm What: The call every mother dreads Why: Who the heck knows why kids do what they do? (Though, as you'll see, I've got no shortage of excuses)

Let me take you for a short walk in my shoes...
Ring, Ring... "Ms. Bilotti, I need to talk with you about Jake's behavior at school today..."
(Silently I'm thinking...Hmmmm...this doesn't sound good. Followed by..Ya think? Followed quickly by... Oh God, did he bite someone again? Is he back to tackling people? And already thinking that whatever it was that he did, it wasn't his fault!!!)

"The past few days of school, we've been seeing some behavioral problems in class with Jake" (I'm thinking...OK, so why the heck did you wait so long to call me? Notice how I'm already deflecting...I think this comes naturally to mommies...LOL) "He's been calling the other children names and not following direction" To which I reply... "Oh my, that's terrible, I'm so upset to hear that" (While thinking... hey, maybe they deserved to be called those names? Maybe they called him names first? Maybe they're being mean to him?)

"Ms. Bilotti has anything been going on at home that may be upsetting Jake? Has he been sleeping OK?" To which I reply "No, there's nothing out of the ordinary going on here...he does have a cold though and he didn't sleep well last night and was up at 4:30 this morning, so I'm sure he's very tired today" (While thinking...as am I, which is why I'm feeling a little cranky about this call and your questions about what trauma I may be exposing him to at home and after all, the poor kid has a cold, and is really tired and when I'm sick and tired, I also sometimes want to call people names...actually, I'm really tempted to call you some names right now, if I'm being honest, that is...LOL)

"We tried to get Jake to go down to the Principal's Office today and he refused to go. So, I told him that I would be calling you and he got very upset by this, but I felt it was important for me to still call" To which I reply... "He wouldn't go? Oh, no, that's terrible. I'm very glad you called so I can talk with him and get this straightened out" (While thinking... Well, of course he wouldn't go, hell, I wouldn't go either if you gave me a choice? And yes, I'm very glad you called because now I can find out who's picking on him and straighten THEM out...actually, maybe I'll send Nanny, she's really good at that...LOL)

Call ends and off I go to pick up my little Angel turned Devil early from school. I drag him kicking and screaming to the Principal's office and as it turns out, the Principal suggested that it may actually be the new cough/cold medicine that I started giving him at the exact time that they started seeing these changes in his behavior. (Turns out she has even better excuses than I do...go figure?) But seriously, we were also seeing signs of this at home as well. Think 4 year old on a combination of ice cream, cotton candy, cake, cookies and a few doses of chocolate on top...that's what he had been like (withOUT any of that crap). Nanny and I had been drawing straws to see who got first dibs to hang themselves on the flagpole out front should he decide to get up at 4:30 am again. She pulled the "senior citizen" card again...SO unfair.

So, needless to say, we immediately took him "off the juice" (oh no, wait, that's JJ)... off the medicine and we've been witnessing a slow and steady return to a normal state of chaos. Might be hard to discern with the naked eye, but crystal clear to Nanny and I. I've also had to reinstate the "no TV if you have a bad day at school" policy. Which ironically only works because he wants whatever it is he can't have...even though we typically don't even watch TV after school.

While putting him to bed that night, I asked him what names he was actually calling the kids at school and in light of the fact that I was expecting something like "butthead", "stupid", "poopy head" (a house favorite)...it shocked me when he said "Momma, I called them Giraffe, Hippamapotomus (Hippo in Jake speak), Cow, Cat, Duck" It took everything I had not to laugh out loud and of course, I did my best to reinforce how "bad" it was to call someone a Giraffe, while all the while thinking "oh come on now, that's all he did?!?!?"

Fingers crossed that we've seen the last of the Principal's office, at least for quite a while!!! Cause I think I may be all out of viable excuses at this point. That's all for now...