Ever have one of those days...

We've all had "one of those days"...days where you're sure you should have NEVER gotten out of bed...where you frequently think of the Southwest airline tagline - "need to get away?" or the Calgon "take me away"...right?

OK, so I had one this week which started out with a call from my boss asking if I was "in the tower at that moment?" (which means at work in New Brunswick, a 40 min ride from my house) …that moment was 7 am….so, the first thing that runs through my mind is...ahhh, unless my 3 yr old is with me, I can pretty much guarantee I’m not "in the tower" at 7 am…(unless, of course, by some miracle, someone was to give me 12 hours notice…10 even..LOL...but that's a whole other story)

So, NO, I’m not there..what do you need? Oh, you forgot that you made changes to the presentation for today and now you need 24 copies of a 40 page deck? And you’re surprised to find that you can’t find any admins around to help make the copies? Can I help you find someone? Hmmmm…so, I scramble to call on every person who ever owed me a favor in the tower and finally one straggles into work and calls me back and she gets started on printing…ahhh, emergency solved, right?! Well, one solved and one created...

I turn around and I now literally have 11 minutes to make the 15 minute drive to Jake’s school to get him there on time and he doesn't have his coat on and we're no where near getting in the car. Now, you may ask, what does “on time” mean in the life of a 3 yr old anyway?? Well, in his new school, the door to the hallway to his classroom closes sharply at 8:45…no if’s, and’s or but I have a million excuses why we’re late…about it. Once that dreaded door closes, mommies lose their ability to walk their child to their classrooms. The office lady takes them instead and when I tell you this causes EVERYone’s day to get off to a bad start…I’m not kidding!!! So this is something I try, really try to avoid at all costs!!!!!!! (And those who know me know, that I DON'T do well with mornings and I'm not exactly known for my promptness...LOL) But, there isn't much I dread less than watching him through that door..walking away with that office lady…with that sad boo boo face which says “why can’t you walk me to my classroom, mommy?!?!?” Ok, sorry, I digress…

Where was I…So I realize that we have 11 minutes and so I grab him and his 10,000 things that are somehow at this very moment now critical to bring to school this morning and off we go running for the car…screeching down the road…turning on 2 wheels…and we make it literally 7 seconds before the door closes!!! Woo-hoo for mommy!!!!!!! OK, so maybe my excitement was a bit premature...

I jump in the car and race off to New Brunswick to take care of my other dependent, my boss…LOL When I arrive, I take a quick look in the mirror because I got a haircut last night and I don’t have all that much left and I want to be sure there isn’t one of the 10 strands left that’s out of place. And to my utter shock, I realize that I had forgotten that I wasn’t actually ready to leave the house when I ran out to take Jake to school… I have NO makeup on…no mascara, no blush, NO NOTHING!!!! OMG, what now?!?!?! So, I run in, get the copies he needs, run up and drop them off outside the meeting room (thank goodness he didn’t see me) and then run back down, jump back in the car and drive to the nearest store to buy some make-up.

Now, as you might imagine, the day doesn't pause for this little excursion...so I'm taking teleconferences on my phone, while answering messages furiously on my blackberry and walking through the aisles of Stop N Shop, muting when I pass crying children and other loud noises that would give my location away, and slowly, but surely find some make-up to wear. Check out, sit in the car and put my make-up on and make my way back to work. Whew!! Disaster averted, right? Hmmmm.

Luckily, I make it back just in time to go into a big "blue suit" meeting...the kind at J&J where everyone is totally on their best behavior because the finance boys in blue are there and we're talking about some very serious stuff...which seems to be most every day these days. I take a deep breath and think, ok, at the very least, I should be able to get a little email done while some of these blowhards are talking. As I scan my email, I'm delighted to find a personal message from my good friend, and fellow posse member, Amy. I open the message and click on the file attached and up pops the following picture right there big and wide on my laptop screen...

Well the two guys sitting on either side of me actually spit their coffee out across the table and the presentation came to a complete and total stop..."want to get away?" I slowly closed my laptop screen, sent my asst an email on my bb to come up with some emergency and 2 mins later, she shows up looking very serious to pull me out of the meeting. Definitely the VERY best laugh I had all day...

Ok, so just when you think it couldn’t get any crazier…with about 20 minutes left in the day, I look down and realize that in my haste that morning, in addition to not putting on any make-up, I also put on BLACK shoes with my BROWN pants and shirt and had been walking around this way ALL day…

So, in an attempt to sneak out, I wait for the elevator, hoping and praying that I don't run into anyone I know, and whew...the door opens and the elevator is empty. Thank goodness...deep breath...sigh of relief...for all of one floor, when the door opens up and our CEO, CFO and CIO get on. (Seems there was an Executive Committee meeting that day...lucky me) So, they say hello and I stand there for an excruciating ride down with my brown pants and black shoes all the way to the ground floor...did I forget to mention that the inside of our elevators are lined with mirrors?!?!

I race off to pick up Jake, only to find him sitting in a "time out" area when I walk in...honestly, by now I'm thinking "what the heck else can possibly happen today?" Well, it turns out that one of his "friends" asked him to help him to "beat up" a bigger kid and it seems he accepted the invitation and two 3 yr olds jumped a 6 yr old...As if that wasn't bad enough, it turns out he also tried to bite a little girl in his class earlier in the day. Maybe we both shouldn't have gotten out of bed?!?!?

So, the line of the week came as we drove home from school. I asked, "Jake Anthony, why on Earth would you try to bite a little girl?!?" To which he answered seriously "Momma, she wouldn't let me kiss her!!" At 3? Holy moly...

Definitely one of those days that I was NOT meant to get out of bed…