Meet Jake Anthony: July 2009

Well, as those of you who follow this blog know, Jake is a "member" of the 1876 gang...a group of kids all born using the same anonymous donor-Fairfax #1876... affectionately known to the "selection committee" as "James" because he looks so much like my brother, James. (And thus, the source of the wonderful addition to our family of Abby, Sharon, Hallie and Baby Lea!!)

Jake, Sharon and Baby Lea

What we've come to learn over the past 4 years is that these kids have an awful lot in common beyond just some physical features (though some of them do have EXACTLY the same toes...VERY funny). For some, this has certainly challenged our "nature vs. nurture" beliefs at times. One behavioural similarity is their STRONG sense of determination...also known as... stubbornness, fierceness and a tendency to be headstrong and strong willed...basically comes down to "they want what they want when they want it and God help anyone who tries to stand in their way"...LOL (Over this past 4th of July, we had a chance to meet up with some of Jake's other "brothers and sisters" and you can see more details in Hallie and Baby Lea's mom's post about the reunion at the following link: http://blogginghallie.blogspot.com/2009/07/meeting-extended-family-belated-fourth.html

Jake and his 7 brothers and sisters (from the bottom left...Ellie, Hallie, Asher, Jake, Baby Lea, Alyssa-not related, from the top left: Jess, Jonah and Ben-trying to make an early exit)

Jake in his reunion shirt

We have witnessed this characteristic come out in Jake, thought admittedly it's mostly when he's hungry, tired or frustrated and at times, the only difference between him and the adults who are with him is the fact that he actually shows what we're all really feeling. But, I do have a growing fear that this characteristic may actually be growing as he grows...in which case, I'm not looking forward to a debate with my likely 6' 2" teenager at some point in the not so distant future. This past week, nanny and I experienced a glimpse of what this might be like first hand.

Nanny stays with us from Sun night to Wed mornings (also known as the period of time where we all live a "fantasy life" at 123 Brandon Ct... ALL clothes get washed and returned to their rightful place ...all cabinets and the fridge/freezer become full of the foods we love... all toys/junk/and just basic crap laying around all find their way back someplace out of sight and order is restored in our little house...and YES, I know how incredibly lucky and spoiled I am!!!...but I digress.) This past Tuesday I had a work dinner and so nanny was going to pick Jake up from camp and take him to the very cool neighborhood swim club we recently joined. At about 3:00, she packed up the car (snacks, toys, bathing suit...we had a "false start" the day before when mommy forgot to pack the bathing suit- was NOT pretty...etc.) and was off to pick up her Chuchees.

When she arrived to pick up Jake, to her surprise (and mine), he had absolutely NO intention of leaving with her...not for the pool, not for ice cream at the pool, not for ANYTHING. Seems he was just having too much fun at camp, and did NOT want to leave. So, Nanny left without him and sent me a message indicating that she wasn't able to get him to leave to go to the pool.

Now, if I'm being honest here, I must admit, I read this email and thought..."oh, come on now, he's 3 for goodness sake!! Just tell him it's time to go and that's it. Plus, it's not like you're picking him up to go to the dentist...you're taking him to the POOL!!!" But I figured it was not a good idea to give Nanny too bad a time about it, after all I was sure she was already disappointed and of course, one never wants to bite the hand that does its laundry, right? LOL Turns out later, this had been quite a good decision on my part...

A while later, I realized that my last meeting was going to end over an hour before I had to be at the dinner. So, I called Nanny and asked her to meet me at the pool and said I would pick up Jake (it was now closer to 5:00) and we'd meet her there. So, poor Nanny, once again put her bathing suit on and packed up the car and got all ready to go AGAIN... In the meanwhile, I made my way to Jake's camp thinking "oh, won't this be a wonderful surprise!!"

I arrive at the door to the camp playground only to find that they are doing WATERPLAY... and for those who are not familiar with the combination of camps and 3 yr olds and summer...this is the complete and total HIGHLIGHT of every day...it's as close as something can come to NIRVANA in the world of a 3 yr old. So, there I stood at the door, watching my son run and scream and laugh and skip and splash and sing as happily as I've ever seen him...as I pondered the two choices before me... Turn and walk away and not even try to get him to leave or take my chances on trying to convince him to stop playing and leave with me and RISK that I would have to admit to my mom (and myself) that I had absolutely NO more control over this 3 (soon to be 4) year old than she did. UGGHH!

So, in the spirit of "try, try again"...I gave it one shot, was summarily SHOT DOWN, and turned and left with my parenting ego between my legs...and NO child at my side. Luckily I was able to catch Nanny before she made her way to the pool and even luckier for me...she didn't have the heart to laugh at me (at least not while I was on the phone, anyway;-)

And yes, for those who remember, this is the very camp that I was SO worried he wouldn't like. Turns out, if it were up to him, it would be a sleepover camp...LOL

Ahhh, but we live to fight another day!!

Here are a couple of pics from the recent donor sibling reunion: